mysharona1987:

Some of the funniest book dedications ever.
mysharona1987:

Some of the funniest book dedications ever.
mysharona1987:

Some of the funniest book dedications ever.
mysharona1987:

Some of the funniest book dedications ever.

mysharona1987:

Some of the funniest book dedications ever.

nebularum:

i have a secret dream to one day unapologetically punch someone hard in the face.

  • me: haha hey guys do u dare me to eat this whole thing of ice cream
  • them: no
  • me: *shaking my head and chuckling* i cant believe you guys are making me do this
  • them: we're not
  • me: *eating right out of the thing* this is so wild you guys you're so fucked up for making me do this

dogthing2:

barely-half-asleep:

Brad Pitt in 1994

I lose my shit every time I see this photoset.

this is not ok

(Source: howtocatchgosling)

(Source: ForGIFs.com)

"I don’t understand why sex is more shocking than violence."
— Lea Seydoux talking about American films. (via ramengirl48)

(Source: tvshows-who-knows)

(Source: foie)

"The woman who doesn’t need validation from anyone is the most feared individual on the planet."
Mohadesa Najumi  (via nyu-tah)
"I am homesick for a place I am not sure even exists. One where my heart is full. My body loved. And my soul understood."
— (via lipstick-bullet)

(Source: psych-facts)

maliataete:

queerbriel:

welcome to womens clothing where the sizes are made up and the measurements don’t matter

(Source: impassionable)

  1. Camera: Nikon D3s
  2. Aperture: f/2.8
  3. Exposure: 1/100th
  4. Focal Length: 28mm
"

One: Buy condoms. Buy them and keep them with you at all times, and use them before you are asked to use them. And use them every time. The peace of mind you allow your partner will free her to be vulnerable with you, and that, my son, is exactly what sex is about. Condoms are sexy. In fact, call buying condoms foreplay.
(Footnote: If you are too embarrassed to buy condoms, you are not ready to have sex.)

Two: Kissing is not merely foreplay. Spend entire evenings making out on the couch while fully clothed. Believe me, dry-humping rocks.

Three: Sex is not just about friction. It’s about emotion. Stop trying to find her clitoris and find her heart. Because then she’ll help you find her clitoris.

Four: If you really wanna know how to please a woman, ask her how she masturbates. Then do that. A lot. If she claims she doesn’t masturbate, offer to take her shopping for a vibrator so you can both learn the vocabulary of her body together.

Five: Don’t put anything in her butthole you wouldn’t want in your own.
(Footnote: Try a pinky finger, it’s kinda awesome.)

Six: When you go down on her—and you will go down on her, and if you are my son, you will be amazing at it—tell her how good she tastes. Stop in the middle and kiss her deeply so she knows how good she tastes. Do the same when she goes down on you.

Seven: A simple Google search will yield 1,327 euphemisms for male masturbation, yet only 23 for female masturbation. If guys spent less time jacking off and more time jilling off, this world would be a happier place.

Eight: Everything you need to know about the importance of the clitoris is in the movie Star Wars. You are Luke Skywalker piloting your penis-shaped X-Wing Fighter deep inside her trench. Remember: seventy percent of all Death Stars cannot be blown up through penetration of the trench alone. It must be through focused contact with that little exhaust port at the top of the trench. Otherwise, any explosions you experience will be merely Hollywood special effects.

Nine: Just because you come doesn’t mean she has, so don’t you dare come before her. Focus completely on your partner. Don’t worry about gettin’ yours, you’re a guy. You always get yours. Your job is to make sure she’s gettin’ hers.

Ten: If sex with your partner lasts no longer than this poem, you are not making love. You are masturbating with her body instead of your hand. Shame on you. Go back to step one. You’ve got a lot of learning to do.
Love, Dad.

"
— Big Poppa E., “How To Make Love” (via kushandwizdom)

HOLY SHIT YES MY FUCKING MANTRA IN TEN STEPS.

(via happybythree)

polkanots:

trends women should avoid 2014: men’s opinions 

"Okay, guy, so why do you feel like you want/need/deserve to settle down with a “pure” woman? I’m genuinely listening. “Oh, it’s because sluts are gross.” Too vague. Do better. “Well, their vaginas are real stretched out and big.” No. “Ummmmm, they probably have a bunch of diseases?” Easy fix! Setting aside the fact that plenty of women contract STIs from monogamous partners or during “safe sex,” it sounds like your real problem here is with illness, not sex. So I assume you’d be fine dating a promiscuous woman who practiced safe sex and happened to be STI-free? “No, because I want a girl who’s traditional and family-oriented.” Having sex doesn’t mean you don’t want to have a family. It just means that you want to have sex. “Yeah, but a slut is more likely to cheat on me.” Really? Then why do couples in the Bible Belt have such a high divorce rate? “The devil, I guess?” NOPE. “I just can’t stand the thought of her getting fucked by all those other guys.” So you’re about to have sex with a woman you’re attracted to, you really want to have sex with her, but all you can think about is her getting pounded by tons and tons of dicks? That sounds like an entirely different issue. “No! I just mean that I struggle with the same powerlessness and insecurity that all human beings do, so as a coping mechanism I take advantage of our culture’s patriarchal power structure and exorcize my feelings of worthlessness by perpetuating shame-based proprietary attitudes over women’s bodies. Basically I’m obsessed with controlling women’s lives because I can’t control my own.” Oh, honey. I know."

Female ‘Purity’ Is Bullshit

Hitting the bullshit nail right on its head. 

Feminists don’t hate men, we hate the bullshit power structure that exists that allows men to take advantage of women rather than dealing with their emotions. 

(via teacheremmalee)